you’re probably wondering why I brought you to this place
well I guess for once I just needed somebody to share this with
to start all over again with a brand new friend (ah, but wishing gets you nowhere)
and first of all there is something if you could tell me, I need to know
just what exactly is it that keeps you alive?
what exactly is it that makes living worthwhile for you?
could it be friendship? I wouldn’t know,
you see I am incapable of having friends
for I am incapable of being a friend
(viewing the world like a TV show)
I always find myself too alienated, never quite knowing just what to say
and time after time I’ve proven to be too selfish, thoughtless, too self-absorbed
oh ask me a question and my silence is your answer
(and the look on your face tells me maybe I should just stay quiet)
the closest I’ve ever gotten to friendship is one-sided conversations
with anyone talkative enough to fill in the gaps, to not notice my absence
besides it seems so phony to me, because forever you are trapped inside your own head
you will never truly know anyone else
all you will know is what they say to you
but how do you know what they are really thinking? how do you know what they say behind your back?
awfully paranoid of me I'm sure,
but how can you be sure?
could it be family? (see the previous category)
could it be sex? (not that I’m any authority)
but sex is merely another way
of wasting time and energy
oh to find a nice young woman to spend the rest of my life with
too escape with each other, find false securities with each other
as we both grow old and ugly and boring together
(the temptation of sex was cleverly crafted to trap people into the slavery of parenthood)
could it be to dream?
ah, dreams just move on as the goal fades away
and all that I want seems so out of reach
(oh must you keep looking at me like that?)
when the first thing on the list of things that I want that I have access to is unconsciousness,
I think of this place

this would be such a beautiful place to die
this would be such a beautiful place to die
lying on the ground
blood spurting toward the sky
far enough of the trail of passers by
this would be such a beautiful place to die

so could it be art, literature, poetry,
creativity, getting closer to the world we see?
but the closer I get to reality, the more depressed I get
the more I discover about this world
the less I want to have any part of it
so could it be entertainment?
escapism’s just another way of wasting time
so we can live a little longer without seeing how pointless life is
awfully negative of me I’m know
but how can you know?
could it be luxury? (the capitalist dream)
I surround myself with electronic equipment
creating songs as a substitution for companionship
but it doesn’t really work
could it be religion? any God that could have possibly
created this world where the most vicious atrocities
are committed by the most devoutly "religious" fanatics (of all persuasions)
in the name of their "god", lost me somewhere
could it be experience? do the good ones
outweigh the bad ones? I really don’t know
I have a hard time experiencing (adventure give me a rash)
so please tell me, where have I gone wrong, what have I missed?
and tell me, would you rather have these as the last sights that you see
than where you work or live, or any place you have to be?
and also, somehow I’d rather have a death of my own choice
than have it happen beyond my control
unexpectedly you know
(oh much you keep looking at me that way?)

this would be such a beautiful place to die
this would be such a beautiful place to die
lying on the ground
blood spurting toward the sky
fading sounds of the inlet nearby/gentle sounds of the lapping streams near by
this would be such a beautiful place to die

oh I hope it will be a nice sunny day
but if it must rain, let it rain
it shall add to the atmosphere
will I become mysterious or will I die into obscurity?
I wonder who will be at my funeral
will they realize they shouldn’t be unhappy?
I wonder who will discover my remains?
I hope they appreciate the excitement...

-----

what, you mean to tell me
you’re the only one who hasn’t seen
the dead body I found in the woods last week?
where have you been?
it’s become a regular tourist attraction
(without bothering to notify
the authorities or next of kin)
so if you could stop drooling in
anticipation for a few seconds, I’ll take you there

here it is, feast your eyes
kick off the flies and get a better look
and as you absorb this gruesome scene
there’s something I’d like to demonstrate
what is the difference between this, and
let’s say, that rock over there
in the present tense they are the same;
inanimate lumps of matter
regardless of whatever may have
transpired in the past

and in the end this is all that
you will ever amount to
no matter what you do beforehand
this will be your fate
for you and I are but egg shells
and any minute now
a safe will fall from the sky and
splatter your yolk all over the place
it’s just something you’ll have to learn to live with

so make the most of every minute
make the most out of your life
life is fragile and unpredictable
so live your life to the fullest
for you and I are but eggshells
and any second now a safe with your
name on it will fall from the sky and
splatter your yolk all over the place
it’s just something you’ll have to learn to live with